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HotCox
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Name: Megan
Country: United States
State: Michigan
Birthday: 2/21/1985
Gender: Female
Interests: writing music, socializing, singing, socializing, surfing the web, napping, socializing .... yeah.
Expertise: did I mention music?
Occupation: Student
Message: message me
AIM:  HotCox123
Member Since:
1/29/2004
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| Yes, it's been quite a long time. But I haven't dropped off the face of the earth.
Things have been quite well. The past month has been quite interesting - and lots of things have changed (including starting school, getting a new computer, and ending an 11-month relationship). But I think it was all change I needed and craved - and for the first time I can ever remember I'm actually looking forward to the coming fall. I think I'm finally emotionally capable of handling the coming of winter on my own, and ready for the challenge. I also think that I was feeling a little stuck and freightened by the fact that I'm going to have to make a decision about my LIFE within the next few months ... and the implications of that decision on my relationship. But now I'm open and free to do just about anything my imagination can come up with. What an exciting (and scary) feeling.
I'm really getting into school this semester. For some reason I just feel endlessly motivated ... and I'm ready to learn a ton of music and really focus my life on that music. So speaking of ... you all need to read this song text. It's BEAUTIFUL.
C'est l'extase langoureuse - Paul Verlaine
C'est l'extase langoureuse
C'est la fatiue amoureuse
C'est tous les frissons des bois
Parmi l'etriente des brises
C'est vers la ramures grises
Le choeur des petites voix.
O le frele et frais murmure!
Cela gazuille et susure
Cela ressemble ou cri doux
Que l'herbe agitee expire.
Tu dirais, sous l'eau qui vire
Le roulis sourd des cailloux
Cette ame qui se lamente
En cette plainte dormante
C'est la notre, n'est-ce pas?
La mienne, dis, et la tienne
Dont s'exhale l'humble antienne
Par ce tiede soir, tout bas?
Translation:
It's langorous ecstasy
It's loving tiredness
It is all the rustling of the woods
In the embrace of the breezes.
It is near the gray branches
The choir of small voices.
Oh the frail and fresh murmer!
It babbles and whispers
It resembles soft cries
The waving grass exhales.
You might say, under the water that bends
the muffled sound of the pebbles,
This soul which laments on this dormant moan,
It is ours, isn't it?
Mine, say, and yours!
Who breathes its humble anthem on this mild evening, so quietly?
oooh I LOVE it. If you have the chance, listen to Claude Debussy's Ariettes Oubliees. It's the first one ... and I'm sure I'll post some more of this beautiful poetry. As for now, i'm out.
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| It's over you guys ... I had the my surgery two days ago. And OH MY GOD what an experience.
Before the surgery, I didn't really know what was going to happen, and not only that, but I had such a hard time imagining the surgical process as well as waking up with smaller boobs that I wasn't even nervous. So after having 3 nurses try to find veins to put the IV in ... the doctor drawing in purple magic marker all over my boobies ... being wheeled all over the hospital ... and apparently singing "you are my sunshine" in harmony with the anesthesiologist after he started giving me the happy juice ... I got CUT OPEN and PUT BACK TOGETHER ... perfectly  .
The recovery process ... not from the surgery but from the anesthesia ... was really rough. I had never been under anesthesia before, and they wanted to see how I would react to it before giving me all the special medicines ... like the ones that get rid of nausea. Yayyy! Sore AND pukey! And being hooked up to that IV ... I seriously had to pee every 45 minutes ... and every time I got up out of my bed I felt queasy. They finally gave me some anti-nausea stuff ... (at like 6:30 pm ... thanks guys for being there when I got out of surgery at 2:00) ... and then that stuff made me shake/tremble/convulse non-stop until it left my body ... at around midnight. Soooo ... needless to say ... surgery day was rough. However ... things turned around at 2 am when I got a different type of nausea stuff that just made me sleep ... and the nurse finally took me off my IV so I could sleep without having to get up every hour. BEAUTIFUL!
The next day (yesterday) was great. I woke up feeling actually HUNGRY (after nothing but 6 saltines and a peanut butter cookie the day before? I wonder why). I refused major pain killers (didn't want to be sick any more) ... was able to eat ... and was allowed to take a shower!
But get this ... this is the coolest part of the whole experience. So I was with the nurse and she was helping me undress to shower ... and I finally actually got to SEE my new breasts ... and they are AMAZING you guys! I made the nurse go get my mom ... and my mom came in and saw me ... and she started crying saying "they're beautiful!" and the nurse was crying saying "I just know I'm going to have to do this someday with my daughter" and I was just plain EXCITED because ... seriously you guys ... they're PERFECT. I've never seen such amazing results from a REDUCTION. And not only this ... but apparently the nurse told my mom when I wasn't around that, out of all the reductions that she's ever encountered, mine was the best job she'd ever seen. How awesome is that?
So it's two days later now ... and I'm feeling GREAT. I'm feeling BETTER than great. I can't believe I had major surgery just two days ago. And I'm so happy that so many people have been so supportive (pun intended). So thanks guys for being there for me, and I will post pictures as soon as I take some good ones!
-Megan | | |
| so ... yes it's been an extremely long time since I've electronically logged my life's happenings. In fact, part of me is beginning to feel I'm a little too old for this stuff. Even though the whole blog-thing started off in my generation, I always think it's weird when some 30-year-old mother of two is blogging. I don't know why ... but it always makes me wonder "if you have two brats running around, shouldn't you be taking care of THEM instead of surfing the internet?!?" And though I am no 30-year-old mother of two ... I still feel a little beyond the blogging days. Beyond, not better than.
All this aside, the reason for this particular entry is that there has been a monumental event that needs to be shared with anybody and everybody. I have finally FINALLY FINALLY scheduled an appointment to ... you guessed it (or maybe you didn't) ... get a breast reduction surgery!!!!!!
I AM SO FUCKING EXCITED!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's been years since I've wanted to take the plunge ... but for one reason or another it never seemed to be the right thing at that time. But I've finally found a doctor who I like and trust, and I finally have time (when I'm not in school or traveling abroad).
I'm really looking forward to it ... I keep on waking up in the middle of the night because I'm so excited/slightly anxious to get it done. Just think ... I haven't had small-ish breasts since I was 14 years old. It's been 7 years of discomfort, embarassment, and back problems. Honestly, the last time I had smaller breasts I was so self-conscious (hell I was in 8th grade) that I couldn't enjoy my body for what it was, even though it was healthy, in shape, AND proportionate.
I can't even imagine what it's going to be like ...
So, y'all got 6 more weeks to enjoy deez double d's. They will be making many partial-public appearances ... I hope you'll be there to appreciate it! And if for some reason you can't come to their going-away party ... you can send presents (shea butter, sexy lingerie size 34 C, chocolate, stuffed-animals, strippers ... etc) to 1117 S. Forest.
Ta Ta to my Ta Ta's! (and to you too!)
-Megan | | |
| Today has been a good day. I'm sure you don't really care, but this really is the definition of a singer's ideal day. Let's recap:
Woke up early and it was sunny and warm outside, headed via bycicle off to UHS (university health services for all non-UMers) because I've been having back pain for two-and-a-half months ... scheduled an immediate physical therapy session ... skipped Italian ... got pampered and massaged for an hour ... scheduled four more sessions for the next two weeks (one of which is a full-body relaxation session) ... found out that I made it into the Jackie O chorus (that's this semester's opera, fyi) ... took the bus up to North Campus while listening to Bjork (who I'm really getting into ... she's an incredibly talented song-writer and uses technology in the most creative ways) ... sat ithrough my Arts Entrepreneurship class ... got all inspired for my future career in music and life in general ... ate a couple of clementines (mmmm) .... and here I am!
The continued plan for this relaxing yet accomplished day:
Practice for an hour, meet with the Jackie O chorus to get music and schedule crap, take a shower and get all pretty ... and then audition for U of M Gilbert and Sullivan Society's production of The Mikado. The results of which I will inform y'all about soon.
Though this semester is going to be crazy, I'm really looking forward to getting my major truly underway. Which means not just learning music and performing for studio class, but really getting out into the community and performing. Yeah music.
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| Things bogging down my mind right now:
- 2 diction performances in the next 2 weeks
- audition for Katz's song class
- turing in a 2-week late lesson observation
- memorizing a shakespearian scene in the next 18 hours
- memorizing and performing 3 more pieces by the end of the semester
- creepy 53-year-old man threatening to sue me and haunting my dreams
- personal issues with the ex
- i need to buy CHRISTMAS PRESENTS ....
Things making me happy right now:
- I ate a lot of yummy food for thanksgiving
- "this guy!" aaaaaaaaaahahaha!
- I'm DONE WITH PAPERS for this semester!
- I'm 3 months away from turning 21
- there's a certain someone with whom I'm enjoying much of my time
- music is the love of my life
- I made it through the fall without getting depressed!
- going to florida in less than a month with the famn-damily
so ... all in all ... there's some good and some bad, but i'm soaking it all in like a good girl should. | | |
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